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Self growth & figuring out my life


In Costa Rica, I learned so much about myself and as cheesy as this sounds it was a real soul searching trip for me. I realized what my priorities in life were and helped to clear up the direction of my life.

I was able to do this because for one of the first times in my life my mind was truly calm. I was able to reflect and think without any distractions. I don't fully know how to explain it but when I'm at home and at school, my mind is never truly at peace. Even when I have free time or time by myself, there are still always a million and one things racing through my head. Schoolwork, social life, boys, upcoming plans, there's always something to think about.

Well, in Costa Rica I was really able to just completely let go of all of that and think. Having this time to be able to reflect, on top of the amazing time that I was having and all that I was learning was so beneficial for me.

Now, whenever I'm stressed out or contemplating things in life, I wish that I could be back at the farm lying in a hammock to think.

It was my first solo travel trip, which I also think meant a lot. I was feeling brave and vulnerable at the same time and surrounded entirely by people who did not know me. I had to learn to be more outgoing and make the effort to engage with people and connect.

Most importantly, I reinvigorated my passion for environmentalism which has been so important in figuring out my life passions and where I want to go in the future. The central valley of Costa Rica is truly the most beautiful place that I have ever been and being immersed in nature, living in the jungle just steps away from the most pristine beautiful waterfalls and hiking was perfect.

Having so much time to reflect and relax also meant that my mind was clear enough to read some books that I have been wanting to read forever. At school, I don't even have the time or motivation to read my books for class so reading books for pleasure is totally out of the picture. In Costa Rica, I read so much and I loved it. Two books were especially important which were Cradle to Cradle and The Story of B. Cradle to Cradle specifically is about environmental innovation and the environmental movement.

So what exactly did I figure out with my life?

Before going to Costa Rica I was absolutely lost in what I want to do as far as a career and just had no image of what my life would look life. I know that I wanted to help people and make the world a better place in whatever way was best but that was about as far as I had gotten.

In Costa Rica, I figured out that my biggest passion is environmentalism. Climate change is real and serious and it's going to have massive impacts in my lifetime (and already is). I really love the world and what we have today and I would like to keep it that way. I feel so lucky to have been able to witness so much natural beauty in my lifetime already and the thought that future generations won't have that is devastating.

I found my love for farming and connected that to environmentalism.

I also realized the far reaching impacts of farming and sustainability on social justice. In fact, I don't think we can obtain social justice until we have sustainable farming and a just food system.

Then I connected those things to self care, health, and feminism.

Everything in my life feels like it has slowly fallen into place and everything is connected. I have more concrete plans now but those could change at any moment. But I do feel much better now having concrete dreams. There are still a lot of questions and details I need to figure out but I'm sure that I will and I am so excited for what's to come.

Still pretty vague but here are my dreams as of today July 16, 2017:

I want to live in a tropical developing country, either somewhere in Central America, Southeast Asia, or Hawaii. I want to run a learning/teaching center. It will first be a farm and I want to teach people and learn myself about sustainable farming and contribute to a sustainable just food system. I want to be deeply involved in the local community. Then I want to have a farm to table restaurant and serve life nourishing healthy food. I want everything to focus on teaching and sharing. Teaching about farming, healthy eating, and self care. I want it to have a volunteer aspect because I have benefited so greatly from work exchange so I want to host WWOOFers or workawayers. Then maybe there would even be a living aspect incorporated. Maybe turn it into a small eco village type of thing?

Like I said, everything is still very vague right now but I couldn't be more excited for what's to come. xx

#travel #costarica #thoughts

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